Flowers and the end of the year

Around 125 million years ago – December 29 on the Cosmic Calendar – the oldest flowering plant fossils currently dated were alive and blooming. Perhaps you can celebrate by giving a flowering plant to a loved one. This is not difficult, as only a few of the commonly-known plants are non-flowering.

Flowering plants include not only flowers themselves; they also include most trees, and even virtually microscopic plants.

Heck, you could even whip up a nice winter broth from nothing but flowering plants and water (seasoned with other flowering plants). Remember, we all depend on flowering plants for our survival (they constitute most of the photosynthetic base of the planetary food cycle).

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I will be occupied for a few days now, and am unlikely to blog until several days into 2008. So here’s a summary of the major events in the Cosmic Calendar over the next few days.

I apologize for the lack of links to my source material. I’m a little ill, and not up to hunting them all down. New Year’s Resolution #1: Be more organized with the Cosmic Calendar announcements next year.

  • 30 December (tomorrow): A moment of silence at 10:00 might be an appropriate way to mark the extinction of the dinosaurs 65 million years ago.
  • 31 December, 10:30 pm (2.5 million years ago): Ancestors of humans appeared. This is the genus Homo, not Homo sapiens yet. Start working on your posture.
  • 31 December, 11:46 pm (420 thousand years ago): Domestication of fire. Light a thin candle (420 thousand years passes quickly in the Cosmic Calendar).
  • 31 December, 11:52 pm (250 thousand years ago): Birth of Homo sapiens. Find some other humans and welcome them to the planet.
  • 31 December, 11:59:40 pm (10 thousand years ago): Earliest farming. Phone a farmer and give thanks for the food you eat.
  • 31 December, 11:59:50 pm (4500 years ago): Pyramids built. That’s right, you have less than ten seconds to embarrass your friends with your “Walk like and Egyptian” tribute to these great symbols of superstition and slavery.
  • 31 December, 11:59:59 pm (500 years ago): Astronomer Nick Copernicus and others mark the dawn of science, a new stage on our path to understanding our real place in the universe, which will eventually culminate in the global adoption of the Cosmic Calendar as an annual cycle of reality-based festivities.
  • 31 December, 11:59:59.9998 pm: Last year’s New Year’s Eve, at which you were woefully unaware of the Cosmic Calendar. Spend the last 2 milliseconds of the year thanking your good fortune for finding it in time for this year’s festivities.
  • 1 January: The Big Bang! We get to start all over again, some 15 billion years ago.

See you all next year.

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One Response to “Flowers and the end of the year”

  1. Solar System forms « Friendly Humanist Says:

    […] those of you who enjoyed the Cosmic Calendar posts in December (here and here), I must apologize for the dearth of them so far this year. Not much happens before December, but I […]

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